- Choose to focus on what you have. There are 2 kinds of people in the world: Those who look PAST what they don’t have and see what they do have and those who look PAST what they do have and see what they don’t have. Which do you think is the happier crowd? This is a perfect time to put your big but in the way (before you get nasty, look at the spelling – but, not butt). When you find yourself thinking, “I don’t have a fishing boat (new car, stand-alone mixer, 10 kids, alpaca… insert your own dream here)” – put your big but firmly down and say, “I do have a rock solid marriage (warm house, terrific son, beautiful daughter, fat cat…. insert your own blessings here).”
- Do what makes you smile inside. Take pen and paper out. Write down 10 activities that make you feel the most content, happiest, and at peace with the world. Sometimes they are so ridiculously simple that you’d almost be embarrassed to admit them. I do this particular exercise, myself, regularly – to make sure that I’m still making time for each. Not only is it a reminder to mostly enjoy what you enjoy most, the exercise serves as a reminder of how many great things you have going on. In fact, I always go beyond the 10. Mine run the gamut from watching Scooby Doo with my husband to shopping with my daughters. I also have cooking, watching movies, bird watching, and playing with my cats amongst the “good times” list. Do you enjoy early morning talks with your daughter or neck rubs from your spouse? Write them down!
- Identify your happiness “blockers.” Happiness blockers would be exactly what you’d expect them to be – things or circumstances that you feel are keeping you from being as happy as you could be. Here’s the key, however: Don’t just identify them and wallow in their presence. Map out a way over, through, or under the blockade! (More on Happiness Blockades Below)
- Master the art of living in the moment. Ever see a dog contentedly lying on a front porch, wagging his tail as he watches people walk by? He isn’t worried about his next meal, he isn’t missing his people who are at work or school, he isn’t living with remorse from the time he growled at the UPS man. He’s just living and loving life as it is right now. What a lesson dogs can teach all of us! We need to embrace more moments as they come and quit fretting over those that are yet to come or those that have come and gone. On my mental fitness blog, Out of Bounds, I sign each post with one of my own personal affirmations, “Make each moment count double!“ I’m all about not just living in the moment, but squeezing the daylights out of it. Regrets and worries are serious happiness blockades, but they’re VERY manageable. You simply have to let go of the past, live in the moment, and refuse to let what may or may not come tomorrow rob you of happiness today. There’s a lot to be said for letting go and moving on. Unless of course you have growled at the UPS man, then I fully expect you to apologize.
- Don’t be so hard on yourself! I read a quote this morning from an interview with a teenage girl. She said that it seemed impossible to live up to the images of actresses and models in magazines. Dang straight! The actresses and models don’t even look like they do on magazines… how can anyone else?! Tyra Banks and Cindy Crawford are just two of a long line of celebrities who have detailed how much propping, stuffing, highlighting, and photo-shopping goes into photo shoots. However even if they did look flawless, smooth, and blemish-free – so what?! No one has to live up to or down to anyone else. Our only competition is ourselves. It’s up to us to look the best we can and to strive for our personal best. Not someone else’s. Accentuate your positives, downplay your negatives, and love yourself for the beautiful person you are. Only judge yourself using your own yardstick, never anyone else’s.
- Laugh it off. No, not everything is funny but there is something funny about just about everything. If you learn to look for the humor in situations, you’ll find yourself laughing more than ever before. I don’t need to tell you what a wonderful thing that is.
- Make sure you’re getting enough – but not too much – sleep. There’s a slippery slope when it comes to sleep. Getting too little of it can affect your mood just as easily as getting too much of it. If you seem to feel kind of down lately, determine if you’re getting more (or less) sleep than usual. Honestly, sometimes a happiness blockade is as simple as shut eye.
- Spend quality time with loved ones. Watch movies, tv, and sports with your friends and family more often. Go for walks or long rides together. Go out for a cup of coffee and catch up on everything going on in your lives. Encourage and support one another and, most of all, just enjoy one another’s company. Make 2011 a year that you start valuing your loved ones more. Let them know that you love them to the moon and back.
- Eat right. Over-eating never leads anywhere worth going. Neither do fried, processed, or fatty foods. Our bodies were meant to eat healthy, natural foods and operate (physically, mentally, and emotionally) better when we provide them with the right kind of fuel. We should all move toward this rule, “If Eve couldn’t have fixed it for Adam, I’m not going to put it into my body.” And before you say anything, Eve was a whiz bang with coffee beans. She ground them with her own little hands, warmed water over the fire, and led the way for us all. Don’t bother looking in Genesis, this part of history is from my own little brain. But given the fact that coffee trees exist, I feel comfortable with my tale.
- Get plenty of exercise and activity. Again, our bodies were made to move and move often. Back to the Garden of Eden: Our ancestors had to hunt, build, forage, clean, and walk long distances. The human body was designed to perform like a machine – yet today we have machines to do practically all of our work, physically as well as mentally, for us. Not good. We have to challenge ourselves to find ways to become more active than we are. Let’s make that much more active than we are.
- Be optimistic. Again, I know that some people are, by nature, more optimistic than others. Some of us see the glass half full while others see it half empty. Then there’s the crowd that sees a glass and screams, “Don’t touch that! It’s all germy and stuff!” I’m a card-carrying optimist and I’ll be one until I meet Adam and Eve face to face (I’ll be the one asking her, “Seriously? For an apple?“). I had rather expect something good around every corner than something hideous. Most of the things we worry about never even come to pass, so why bother worrying in the first place?
Friday, January 28, 2011
11 Things That Can Make You Happier in #2011
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